Dining & Nightlife | Singles

Starting Over

I’m looking for advice on how to start over. I’m currently in the process of getting divorced (amicable) after being married for 19 years. I’m 47 years young, attractive, mother of two teenagers and haven’t been on a date in 20 years! Help, I’m not sure what to expect!

Dear Starting Over:

Congratulations—looking forward to starting this part of your life is such a positive beginning. First and foremost, be content with being by yourself. This will allow you to take your time, not fear being alone and really enjoy the meeting and dating that will happen. Take a good look at what you desire in a partner. Know the qualities that you really enjoy and want—and also what you don’t want.

Do you have interests that you have abandoned? Get involved in them again. Join a dating network. Test it out…see if that is for you. The trick is not to expect anything. Until you get out there and see what “dating” after being married for 19 years is all about, you won’t know. Be yourself. If you like him, great­—go on another date. Be careful though. I suggest not meeting at your house, don’t give out personal information and whatever you do, don’t talk about your “ex” on your date. Ask questions and find out about Mr. New Guy! Have fun!!

—Jeanie
“Love yourself first and everything falls into line”

Dear Amicable:
47 is very young. You are not starting over, you are entering a new and wonderful phase of your life. It’s about discovering your real identity. Take a big deep breath every morning and exhale with a big smile. Dating, shmating! It’s not that important. It’s more important to be out doing productive things that will enhance who you are. Enjoy what you have never done. Take action. Make new friends, both male and female. It’s not easy going out by yourself socially but do it anyway. Go out early, meet people, smile, have fun and most of all stay in the moment. Once you do date, practice this with friends: Never talk about your ex, your divorce, your problems, etc. A mysterious woman is an attractive woman.

­—Garrett
“The most useless day of all is one in which we have
not laughed”

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